June 24, 2010

Please Don't Be Angry (BTP#8)

Instead of using the exact idea of the prompt at http://bigtentpoetry.org , (not knowing how to write about a topic) I took it to a slightly different place...how to find the right words to TELL someone something negative when it's absolutely necessary without causing a bigger problem...(Isn't this something we all struggle with from time to time?)

How do I tell you
without invoking a stoning-
or acrimonious torrent
of off topic vitriol?

I don't think you're stupid
(maybe slap-dash or lazy)
but that's something I'm used to
like traffic or television.

If it wasn't so blinding,
like a huge neon billboard
forcing my focus
and ruining the view.

Or if this had happened
on your own desert island
and not thrust hard upon me
like some prison tattoo.

I would not have to tell you
that the chaos you created
while refusing assistance
must now be demolished....

along with our relationship.


  1. Was there something you wanted to tell me, Cynthia?! Good poem!

  2. Oh, it's final, then! I don't think I've ever read a poem like this -women so often partake of the culture of whining and I am so relieved to find that is emphatically not here. Rather it seems a poem where the narrator is practicing the confrontation to come, and how she will extricate herself from a relationship that is clearly not working for her. In my reading, she is clear, strong, determined, and with good reason. I like that the reasons are only hinted at (the chaos you created). Like a strong wind, this poem is full of passion!

  3. A very strong and passionate piece! Thanks for sharing!


  4. i like not knowing what the exact thing is. "how do i tell you" -- the question itself -- is strong enough for the piece. and you give us a good sense of how difficult it's been.

  5. The finality of it all is what struck me, Cynthia.

    Your frustration shows quite clearly.

  6. demolished...
    along with our relationship

    Very strong words. How you feel comes through with power! Extremely well written!

  7. This is the poem I was trying to write and couldn't. Mine was far more brutal and terribly disturbing to me. Hats off to you for getting the job done, well.


  8. Pithy poem. So that's how it's done! :)

  9. All I can say Is WOW, very very good job!!!

  10. Derrick has that effect on a lot of people Cynthia.You should forgive him because he writes good sonnets. Enjoyed your poem.

  11. Good poem, but ever-surious, I do what to know what he did!

  12. This is one of my very favorite of yours, Cynthia. :0)

  13. I stopped by earlier, thought I left a comment, but apparently not. Sorry.

    Thoroughly enjoyed this strong work, esp the default prison tat. Well done.

    And thanks for stopping by the Eggs.

  14. "How do I tell you" ... it seems you found the perfect way to say it! Well done, Cynthia!

  15. Cynthia
    Quite the powerful poem!

  16. Strong emotions, lovely words

  17. I'm a bit confrontation averse, so I struggle with this quite a bit. I like the "prison tattoo" image... very jarring.

  18. God, I LOVE this poem!I can relate to it in terms of how I felt when I was cheated on by someone. The ruining the view part, especially, can be interpreted in terms of- w/o my consent.

  19. Cynthia..I love this poem! Your sentiments mirror my own...you hit that universal good poems embrace. Well done. Love it. Now if only i could muster the courage to be so confrontational myself. :)

  20. I really like this.